Beautiful

I saw a girl just like me, swimming in the wild blue sea. She was beautiful, exciting, wonderful, and wild. 

While I am just plain, boring, lonely, and mild. She had a gently flowing hair, and big beautiful eyes. She looked happy and wise. I looked at her and then at me, so ordinary...

All of a sudden it started to rain. She began to fade, losing her great complexion I saw it was none other than my own reflection.

A Year Away*

Lately, as the 13 year mark approaches, I have been in deep thought.  I can't seem to stop it. So many questions. Very little answers. Uneventful days. sleepless nights. Wondering if a revelation is upon me is very tiring. I want it all to end... Are you there revelation??...


Are you?...

On a sad day

Don't cry for me I'm not worth the tears, Don't reach out your hand to me I don't need your charity, Don't pretend to know me I don't even know myself, Don't fake a smile for me I'm not worth the effort, Don't stop and talk to me just keep on walking, Don't feel sorry for me I don't need your sympathy, Don't offer your shoulder I don't need your support, Don't tell me its going to be alright I'm not stupid, Don't bring GOD into this not even he can help me.

*Mothers Day

Thank you for always being there for me when I needed you the most

Thank you for always protecting me

Thank you for believing in me

Thank you for being my mom

These are the things I wish I could tell you

These are the things I wish you were

You pretend as if nothing happened

I pretend as if nothing happened

How can I forgive you...

Here we are...

Happy Mothers Day

It's so hard...

To want to get better means be ready to face the pain. It is only when you face the pain that you will begin to gain a healthy perspective from which you can then think less distortedly, to the point where you will be able to recognize when you are so triggered as to blur your past with someone in your present.

Personal responsibility is key here as well. You must take responsibility for your needs, your wants, your pain, your actions and you must learn that there is no excuse for abuse. Blaming anyone else, even someone who abused or hurt you in childhood is not going to help you heal now. It will not help you meet your needs. It will not help you learn how to maintain relationships. It will not help you to find yourself... -Uknown

If these walls could talk

I'm fighting an invisible battle in my mind, searching for someone to help
If these walls could talk you would know about my cries at night  and know about my wounded soul
you'd be able to help me win this fight
Blinded by outside appearance you automatically  think my life is in place
Only if these walls could talk you'd be able to see the anger that burns in my gaze, the hope that is slowly fading away, the madness that sets my eyes ablaze
My heart is aching i can no longer take this hurt
Only if these walls could talk
They'd tell me there is a better tomorrow
They'd tell me there is a man upstairs looking down on me, one day he'll wipe away my tears, and there will be no more sorrow
Only if these walls could talk...

whisper

A whisper so quiet no one hears it 

A whisper so soft only the leaves can feel it

A whisper that holds so much promise it cant be held back

A whisper that can change lives  so completely it should be heard

But we all ignore it and it stays a simple whisper